Maddie-ness

San Diego with Padre and Madre

2010-09-28T00:50:00.005-05:00

A day at the aquarium

2010-08-27T23:50:00.002-05:00

The Aquarium of the Pacific in Long Beach is one of my favorite places to hang out. It's also the first field trip that I ever suggested myself--when I was still 3, I saw an ad for it on TV, and asked to go. My parents had never heard of it, but it turns out to be pretty great.

Of course, the main attraction for the masses is the big tanks with sharks, and we got to see them being fed today:

The lorikeets, which you can feed, are also a big hit:

However, I have now become a bit of an aquarium connoisseur, and so I have favorites off the beaten path, such as the leafy sea dragon:

But my favorite fish of all is the purple queen. This is one of the females:

I dragged dad through the place until we found it again...

--Maddie

Soccer season

2010-08-22T00:29:00.004-05:00

I'm going to be on a soccer team in the fall, and Dad's going to be our coach.

We got blue uniforms because Dad got the last pick in the uniform lottery...

As you can see, I'm super-fast -- almost too fast for Dad's new camera

Concert at the Getty

2010-08-22T00:19:00.003-05:00

We had a wonderful day seeing Elizabeth Mitchell at the Getty -- Thanks to Sara Koenig for the tipoff!

Diving to new depths

2010-06-25T19:38:00.001-05:00

Maddie's First Dance Recital

2010-06-12T23:55:00.000-05:00

2010-06-12T23:54:00.001-05:00

2010-06-12T23:54:00.000-05:00

2010-06-12T23:53:00.000-05:00

2010-06-12T23:52:00.001-05:00

2010-06-12T23:52:00.000-05:00

2010-06-12T23:51:00.000-05:00

2010-06-12T23:50:00.000-05:00

2010-06-12T23:49:00.000-05:00

Tickling the Ivories

2010-04-25T12:55:00.003-05:00

I seem to have my great-grandmother's affection for the organ...

We love you, GG!

Praise the Lord and pass the remote

2010-02-26T13:57:00.003-05:00

Maddie likes to pray before dinner, which for her means that someone else prays and she repeats what they say. So this was the scene from last night:

Yvonne: Lord, we pray for healing for our colds...

Maddie: Lord, we pray for healing for our colds...

Y: ...and we thank you for each other's fellowship....

M: ...and we thank you for each other's televisions....

New Year's Week 2010 at Vail

2010-01-10T20:45:00.005-05:00

It was good times in the snowy tundra of Colorado. I started ski school in the newbie group, and by the start of the second day I had moved up so fast that my instructor had to instruct me not to tell anyone I'm three. Here's a sample:

And some other varieties of fun:

I also had a great time with family, including Bella the dog, who is as patient as she is large...

We even saw our old friends the Fergs:

Good times.

A Lion Dance

2010-01-09T21:04:00.003-05:00

Christmas presents

2010-01-09T20:51:00.004-05:00

Gram bought me the best baby carriage ever.

And cousins Ellen and Jeff got me the best baby ever to put in it.

Halloween

2009-11-03T22:43:00.002-05:00

Sugimaru is a neighborhood friend. Every year we go trick-or-treating together through the neighborhood. Last year we were both princesses. This year we went different directions. We must be growing up.

Beginning my education in earnest

2009-10-31T10:39:00.003-05:00

You will want to click on the photo to enlarge it, so you can see what I'm reading.

And it wasn't even Halloween yet

2009-10-31T02:13:00.003-05:00

2009-10-24T11:07:00.000-05:00

Yvonne to Fiona (Chinese exchange student): "Do you want to get your hair cut?"

Fiona: "No, I want to grow it out long."

Maddie: "Then you'll look like a hobo!"

There's some backstory here, but it's funnier without it.

Fire and Water

2009-09-02T23:33:00.004-05:00

Another belated post...

We went to the Channel Islands recently, which you get to by a shuttle boat. Practically no civilization on the islands at all (that lighthouse is no longer in use). They call them America's Galapagos...

Here's a shot of the boat we took the first day:

We saw these:

Really, though, this was the highlight:

Don't worry -- those dolphins are not about to become oceangoing roadkill -- they're surfing!

Seriously.

Oh, right... then we came home to this:

That photo was taken from our front yard. While we were gone, they had evacuated our neighborhood. We actually missed the worst of the scare; what you see there is a controlled burn on the hill above us, intended to rob the fire of fuel so it couldn't spread to the houses.

So we came back and had to breathe smoky air for a few days, and brush the ash off everything outdoors. Inside, though, things were fine. And now it's mostly back to normal. Well, as normal as Southern California gets...

In other news, I'm back to school again, and settling in a little more quickly this time.

--Maddie

My portrait of Daddy

2009-08-28T22:44:00.002-05:00

I drew this today:

You may wonder: "Has Chris grown a beard?" No, silly! Those are teeth!

--Maddie

Summer, cont.

2009-08-23T10:57:00.004-05:00

We went to the Norton Simon Museum yesterday. I found a lot to like. We looked at ballerinas...

... and a girl with a book:

And also some partly-used bars of soap:

(please pardon the obligatory cheap shot at modern art)

It's a nice place:

Maddie in your face! (wait for it):

Happy summer, everyone!

--Maddie

My most photo-intensive post ever

2009-08-02T13:58:00.008-05:00

A reader recently drew our attention to the fact that we had gone all of July without a post. I'm not quite sure how that happened, but I have appointed a special investigative commission to look into it.

In the meantime, this is what's been going on:

We went to a train museum...

...helped raise some baby birds that hatched right outside our back door...

...enjoyed a visit with my fairy godmother Debbie and Orion...

...during which we visited the Griffith Park observatory and I got to study under a master...

...and in keeping with the celestial theme, we camped out at Deukmejian Wilderness Park to see fireworks on the 4th.

We also said a very sad goodbye to an old friend who was suffering...

...and the next day a little cat showed up at our door and wanted in...

...really wanted in:

We have not acquiesced just yet, but we did give her a name: P.C. (Paloma Cat).

I also started a new school and made new friends...

...then went to a great beach at Carpinteria...

...followed by a very civilized afternoon of wine tasting with fromage and charcuterie.

Apart from these highlights, if you want to know what we've mostly spent the month doing, see the post below.

Swim floats?

2009-06-30T21:52:00.003-05:00

We don't need no stinking swim floats...

"I am not a mixer"

2009-06-22T14:43:00.004-05:00

Maddie to Mama, upon being told to keep stirring a bowl of ingredients:

"I am not a mixer; I'm an artist." (gets down off stool and walks away)

Flipping out

2009-06-20T23:13:00.002-05:00

Disneyland, Take 2

2009-06-16T00:14:00.008-05:00

These days, if you want words from me, all you have to do is call me. I usually have mom and dad laughing for the half of the day they're not grumbling, but they're too tired afterward to remember any of it. So the pictures will have to do.

This is me on Splash Mountain. The nice young lady in front of me is my buddy Ashley:

On the Davy Crockett canoe ride:

Getting my face painted:

Meeting my favorite princess, Ariel:

I'm working on Mom and Dad to get us yearly passes. Dad said something about them "costing more than our car," but not to worry. I can be very convincing. -- Maddie

My archaeological dig...

2009-06-09T13:37:00.003-05:00

...at the Skirball Center in Los Angeles.

Daddy was helping me read a faux Proto-Semitic inscription that we dug up.

Next summer, maybe we'll do this for real...

--Maddie

Back in Cali

2009-06-03T18:03:00.004-05:00

It's been a long time since I last posted. After being exiled to wintry Chicago for the past 9 months, I finally made the long journey back to Cali to join my family.

The tiny human has grown. Now she thinks she's supposed to take care of me. Here she is trying to tuck us in to bed. On the kitchen floor.

Do I look amused?

--Paloma

Growing like a weed!

2009-05-24T01:17:00.004-05:00

Mama and I grow many things in our garden: lettuce, tomatoes, strawberries, green onions, tiny deformed carrots, lots of flowers -- you name it.

But the plants neither demand as much care nor give as much delight as I do.

--Maddie

Wet wiped

2009-05-23T23:30:00.005-05:00

We spent the afternoon today in Ladera Ranch, in Orange County, with Ellen, Jeff, and my new cousin, Jasmine. She's so cute! I can't wait until we can play together. Today I settled for rocking her vigorously in her car carrier.

Let me tell you something about the OC -- it may be sort of a weird subculture, and it may feel a little like Dallas, but they've got themselves a killer water park:

I include this video of the superbucket in action because you could hardly envision the violence, carnage, and joy if I did not:

So I was pretty much wasted on the way home, melted down in the bathtub, etc. All in all, another average day in the life of the Madster.

--Maddie

Rachel Alexandra -- You go, girl

2009-05-16T18:44:00.002-05:00

This is just a quick shout out to my fellow fast and overachieving 3-year-old, Rachel Alexandra. Way to take it to the boys.

You go, girl!

--Maddie

The Hays Pool is Officially Open

2009-05-10T20:13:00.007-05:00

I love to swim more than just about anything. It's the first thing I want to do in the morning. I will swim for hours if you will, and when you finally drag yourself out, I will beg you to stay in.

On the West Coast, we don't wait for Memorial Day. A week of temps pushing the 90s, and the pool is already at swim temperature... well, uh, competitive swimming temperature. You won't break a sweat in there.

Nonetheless, the water is just as refreshing as I remembered it - maybe even more so. Dad finally had the pool cleaned but he forgot to switch out the pool lightbulb when the water was drained. So, I guess no night swimming this year.

Here's me practicing my jumps:

In California with Dakota

2009-04-25T19:49:00.004-05:00

It's been a while since I last blogged, but I am picking up right where I left off: Hollywood.

People often wonder what an L.A.-based kiddieblogger such as I does on the weekends. Mostly, I hang out with other child stars. Like today, when I met up with Dakota Fanning at Griffith Park:

She's really unbelievably charming, and she keeps asking me when I'm going to costar with her. I keep telling her that my schedule is too crazy...

HOLLYWOOD

2009-04-10T22:06:00.000-05:00

A Natural Teacher

2009-03-17T18:34:00.007-05:00

Both my parents are educators. So it's not really surprising that I have a little of it in me, too. Just see for yourself.

Here I am teaching mom and Gram how to dance.

Here I am teaching Gram how to slide without picking up too much static.

Here I am teaching Dad how to wave to the adoring crowd below. It was just Uncle Jerry down there but I told Dad, "You got to start somewhere."

And here I am teaching the boys at soccer practice how to stretch on the white line.

Reverend Daddy

2009-03-17T16:44:00.005-05:00

Daddy became a Reverend last week at church. I went up, like Gram and Gandalf, to pray for him.

But I was told that I had to be at least a deacon. Sorry, my misunderstanding. I thought Princess (TM) trumped everything. (Exit left.)

Catching Up 2: My Second Third Birthday Party

2009-03-14T23:54:00.004-05:00

Imagine my surprise when I woke up from my nap to another birthday party, this one just for family:

My favorite present was a ballerina musical jewelery box that Gram brought back from England, which earned my best fake smile, and real joy:

Naturally I broke it the next day, but Mama fixed it, and so far entropy has not taken it.

Anyway.... after I opened this one, I pretty much lost interest in the other boxes, but I did humor my parents and parents by playing dress-up. I think Mom and Dad can remember when these flapper dresses were in style the first time. (Old folks are so adorable.)

We're still on last Saturday. There's a lot of catching up still to do...

--Maddie

Catching up: Installment #1: My Birthday

2009-03-12T22:03:00.005-05:00

Wow. What a weekend. Gotta start somewhere...

It started with my birthday, for which Mama imported Disneyland to our house:

(I have video of a very prominent New Testament scholar bouncing in that thing, but I am withholding it in case I need help paying for college or something.)

My magical day continued...

(That's Dad doing the Twist-n-Shout with me. Aunt Abbey said it was awesome and she wished that she had captured it on video for posterity!)

That's Belle, by the way. I don't think she played guitar or painted faces in Beauty and the Beast -- but it's a tough economy, so I guess even a Princess (TM) figures she should give a little value added.

And Aunt Abby brought fabulous homemade cupcakes!

So, now I'm three, and I will tell you so if you ask!

"The South Land," by T.S. Eliot

2009-02-23T01:55:00.002-05:00

Nam Maddam La Crescentis ipse oculis meis vidi, et cum dixi, τί Θέλεις; respondebat illa: εσΘιειν Θελω.

February is the cruelest month, blowing
everything everywhere, mixing
short days and chilliness, bothering
Maddie Mei with too much rain.

In the San Gabriel mountains, there you feel free.
I play with trains, much of my naptime, and watch Dora when I wake.

I will show you fear in a handful of juice.
Those are jellybeans that were his eyes.

And mama and daddy saying,
HURRY UP PLEASE IT'S TIME
HURRY UP PLEASE IT'S TIME

So rudely forc'd!
What you get married for if you don't want children?
O ces voix d'enfants!

I Madster have foresuffered all.
Maddih Maddih Maddih(1)

____________________________________________

(1) -- Maddih. Repeated as here, a formal ending to a blog posting. 'The Uproar which passeth understanding' is a feeble translation of the conduct of this word.

Free fallin'

2009-02-23T00:44:00.003-05:00

Our seemingly interminable week of rain* finally ended, and so we headed to Millard Canyon to hike -- certainly the most serious mountain climbing I've ever done.

... and the payoff at the end:

Mostly, though, I was my usual subdued, contemplative self:**

--Maddie

* -- If Mom and Dad stay here long enough, eventually I will probably start saying things like this with a straight face.

** -- It will probably never be possible to say this with a straight face.

Blast from the past

2009-02-19T02:45:00.001-05:00

It's easy to forget that I have always been this cute...

Perspective

2009-02-13T21:50:00.002-05:00

As you can tell (again) from the last post, my parents think I'm pretty d*** special. But at least they're not pompous enough to give me my own gallery show for my art.

Giant Madster, redux

2009-02-12T00:14:00.002-05:00

Almost three years old, almost 40 inches tall.

I had lunch with daddy at his work today. Someone who met us in the hall said, "I have a son about her age. He'll be five soon."

Visiting neighbors

2009-01-31T23:16:00.001-05:00

I finally went to visit my neighbor Mickey today...

Unlike Daddy, Mickey lets me drive...

One from the archives

2009-01-29T18:38:00.003-05:00

To keep the support base happy while we experience technical difficulties.

Dear Maddie fans

2009-01-28T00:30:00.002-05:00

You may be wondering about the blog. The new camera went back to the store because it had a dead pixel on its screen, so we are cameraless again.

Just as well, really -- this week's news is not very photogenic: I'm learning to use the potty!

Male role models

2009-01-17T16:48:00.005-05:00

It's important for a girl to have male role models to look up to. (Mama could probably cite you the literature on that topic.) Yesterday daddy carried me up the mountain behind our house...

Then we came home and I practiced being daddy...

...after which I practiced being Gandalf:

Camera

2009-01-13T06:35:00.002-05:00

I had a run-in with the papa-razzi this week and ended up dropping our camera on its lens. So, uh, no new photos for a week or so while we wait for the new one to arrive...

Colorado

2009-01-10T13:19:00.006-05:00

Now that our bitter cold snap here in La Crescenta has broken and temps are back in the mid-70s, I can think back with some fondness on our week in arctic Colorado.

This is the very dangerous Magic Carpet lift that injured daddy's knee:

It wasn't captured on video, but this was my reaction to my first time skiing:

"I want to go faster! Faster!!"

"Stop holding my hand! I want to do it myself!"

"I want to ride the big ski lift with the bar!"

Once I get potty-trained, look out mountain...

--Maddie

Four more years!

2009-01-07T23:38:00.000-05:00

Just four more years until I can drive!
Just four more years until I can drive!

Sea World and Christmas Eve

2008-12-25T00:39:00.004-05:00

The Pasadena area has been bitterly cold for the last couple of weeks--we're waking up to temperatures below 50! So we fled south to San Diego to hang out with Mom and Dad's old friends the Fergs and check out some marine life.

Here, I have to say, pictures probably tell the story better...

(I saw my first movie in a theater, and it was in 3D, for good measure!)

Finally, we went to a Christmas Eve service at church. This church is apparently a bit imagination-impaired -- they brought in real animals to help them picture the nativity scene! No seriously, we love La Crescenta Pres. But just as seriously, these Angelenos like a bit of showbiz, don't they?

Unlike the flamingos pictured above, that donkey is not actually trying to eat my hair.

--Maddie

How to fall asleep

2008-12-17T01:48:00.001-05:00

The scene: Maddie is in bed whispering to her stuffed lamb.

Mom: What are you doing?

Maddie: Talking to lambie.

Mom: About what?

Maddie: Sleep. Pause. How do you sleep?

Mom: I close my eyes and think happy thoughts. What do you do?

Maddie: I close my eyes and think naughty thoughts.

Lastly, the Santa Monica Pier

2008-11-21T18:16:00.007-05:00

I rode my first roller coaster!

Just kidding! I did drive some cars and fly an airplane, though.

Daddy, however, says I need to take driver's education. I say, "Whatever."

Second, apple-picking

2008-11-21T18:06:00.006-05:00

We also drove a long way in the hot sun to find apples to pick. I had more fun in the raspberry bushes but, alas, I have nothing to show for that. I ate most before we got home. It was like, Blueberries for Sal.

I learned that Granny Smith apples are a bit tart.

First, belated Halloween picture

2008-11-21T17:58:00.003-05:00

At first, I was shy about walking up to strangers and saying this bizarre greeting, "Trick-or-treat." But, by my third packet of M&Ms, I was taking candy for each hand.

It's Obama Time!

2008-11-08T19:40:00.008-05:00

So far I have learned to say "He's my first president!" when I see his picture in the newspaper. In his honor, I have adapted one of the masterpieces of Western literature:

Eight years are up.
It's getting late.
W's passed his expiry date.
It's Obama Time!

Good for society's bottom!
Good for its top!
Get your yourselves set to Obama-de-bop--
It's Obama Time!

Some voters are old
and some are new.
Some states are red
and some are blue.
Some voters' logic is fuzzy.
Some is not.
But we can all be happy with the president we've got.
It's Obama Time!
Ooooo yes, it's Obama Time!

Some voters are Hispanic and some are Asian,
But everyone's horrified by Sarah Palin.
She might be crazy or she might not--
Thanks McCain for making Barack the only choice we've got!

Obama unites the left.
Obama charms the right.
'Bama 'bama 'bama 'bama Biden!
Everybody's dancing in the streets tonight.
'Bama 'bama 'bama 'bama Biden!

Now everyone to Grant Park in one big crowd,
crying and marveling and yelling real loud.
It's Obama Time!

Yes we can, yes we can shine a light--
Do not go gentle into that good night.
It's Obama Time!
(LOUDER, LOUDER)
It's Obama Time!
(LOUDER, LOUDER)
IT'S OBAMA TIME!

Please feel free to share with your friends who are toddlers, or who have them. They are the only ones who are likely to get it.

Congratulations, President Obama!

2008-11-04T23:06:00.003-05:00

One nice thing about living in California is that important things happen at more kid-friendly hours.

I was so happy I was doing flips.

Building a mommy

2008-11-02T17:18:00.004-05:00

Sometimes she just doesn't come around fast enough when I need her so I have to make do.

The artist formerly known as Madster

2008-10-29T16:42:00.008-05:00

I am always venturing into unknown territory. This time, I thought I'd try some abstract expressionism. Here is my new technique. What do you think?

I'm also, of course, working on realism. That's a picture of my grumpy mom who doesn't understand that naps and going to bed early are not part of an artist's life. Am I wrong?

You Win(d) Some, You Lose Some

2008-10-17T00:11:00.009-05:00

We definitely lost this week, and I'm not talking about the value of my 529 account either. Though, at this rate, I'll be lucky to afford state schools when I am college-aged. But, back to my point, the Santa Ana winds hit early this week. I lost the patio umbrella that gave me shade whenever we ate outside in our beautiful garden. Mom lost new plants she just put into the ground, including some of our fall and winter vegetables. Dad lost his new pool floats. Apparently, the desert heats up and sends gales up to 75 mph through the valleys to the ocean, regularly. I thought we weren't in California anymore after a night of terrifying winds.

But, we still counted our blessings. One of mom's new mommy friends lost her home in a wildfire fueled by the winds, and another was evacuated at 2 am. Mom says she is going to pack a suitcase and leave it in the car when the Santa Anas return. I hope she remembers my blankies.

2008-10-05T21:31:00.002-05:00

I had a playdate with my new friend Soo-ji today. A snippet of conversation from dinner:

Daddy: Do Soo-ji's parents speak Korean to her at home?

Mommy: I don't know. Yono claims she doesn't speak Korean. She understands it, but she doesn't speak it.

Me: I speak Korean.

Mommy and Daddy: (laughter)

Me: I speak Gram. Can we see Gram? [Note: Gram is pronounced "garee-am" in Maddie-ese and therefore sounds kind of like "Korean."]

Daddy: Not "Gram" -- "Korean"!

Me: Gram is in Korea?

We're the Mesopo-TAY-MEEE-ANS!

2008-10-05T01:01:00.006-05:00

Dear Readers,

I'm going to turn this one over to dad, because I never know what he's talking about when he talks about work:

One of the interesting things about Los Angeles is that it appears to have a bit of an ancient Near East fetish. Not so much the universities, as you might expect (although there's a lot going on there, too) -- no, I mean the broader culture.

People will tell you that Glendale is the most Armenian place in America, and let me tell you -- those Armenians like them some ancient Near Eastern nostalgia. Mostly that plays out in names of restaurants and such, but straight down the hill from our house on the main road is this:

The first time I saw that (after I drove off the road), I took it as a clear Yahwistic omen that we were to buy this house. I mean, given, someone really didn't do their art history homework on this one -- I believe the technical term for this style is not "Urartian" but "Neo-Assyrianish" -- still, points for enthusiasm.

If it was an omen, there may be another house somewhere around Commerce, CA, that would have been equally divinely approved for us (although it would have been a long commute), because of this:

According to this Web site (and who would doubt the information of someone who reviews outlet malls for fun?): "The exterior of the Citadel Mall was created to look like the Babylonian palace of King Sargon II! The unusual Babylonian/Assyrian archetectural [sic] style was dreamed up by the owner of a tire-production company (first owner of this complex), and was built back in 1929. During its long history, this building was also used in the filming of the epic Hollywood movie, Ben Hur!"

The construction date makes it a late reflex of the popular fascination with Mesopotamia that started around the turn of the 20th century -- before the great Depression and the Second World War made such things look decadent (again), I suppose. Why is it that, to my knowledge, our very recently deceased Gilded Age didn't give rise to such ambitious Babylonisms? (I mean, Urartu Restaurant... that's just not a contender. Neither is this.)

So in sum, even on the far side of the world from the Holy Land, I am surrounded by reminders of my research. There is something right about the fact that they preside over outlet malls and banquet facilities.

I suppose if I were more of the Falwell stripe, I might take these as symbols that I have come to "Los Angeles Babylon," a cauldron of unholy loves singing about my ears. Instead, when I drive on the freeways of the Golden State, I simply enjoy hearing echoes of a very old culture in this young city.

...

Dear Readers,

Maddie here again. See what I mean? Gibberish. Back to me next time.

--Maddie

Dear Wall Street

2008-10-03T17:23:00.002-05:00

Dear Wall Street,

I sent you a gift of $2000 today, and I am just writing to say that I hope you enjoy it. I hope that after all your six-figure bonuses, this little gift from me helps you to not feel the pinch of the economy too much, while small businesses are failing, and parents are dropping off their children at police stations because they can no longer take care of them.

And dear Congress, enjoy your back-slapping. Way to take a stand. It's amazing how much better that cow patty tasted when it was covered in pork, eh?

Of course, I didn't really send $2000...

...it could be more. Who knows how much this will end up costing me and the other two-year-olds of America?

Dad says this is what you get when you send anti-intellectual robber barons to the White House. I don't know anything about that; I just hope you and your rich friends feel better now, Mr. Paulson, because I'm a sweet little 2-year-old girl, and I like for everyone to be happy.

--Maddie

Odds and ends

2008-09-22T01:21:00.003-05:00

This morning, Dad tried to bring me to bed with him and Mom when I woke up. Of course, I was up again in a couple of minutes. Then the house got very quiet for about 20 minutes -- so quiet that Dad got worried. This is what he found when he got to the back room:

Cousin Cathy brought the whole family to visit: husband Fonda, and daughters Irene and (another!) Yvonne.

They brought me pie and new friends. Enough said.

--Maddie

Mali(fa)bu: My shameless attempt to lure Gram back to the U.S.

2008-09-22T00:53:00.005-05:00

Dear Gram,

Much to our surprise, we discovered this weekend that Malibu is little more than half an hour from where we live!

It took us barely a week to go from EST to PST, but six weeks more to actually lay eyes on the mighty Pacific.

I found my calling in life: Professional surfing.

One of the surfers offered to let me stand on her board, but I decided I would perfect my technique before I do that.

Also: Where does the water go when you pour it into a hole in the sand? Is there some elaborately engineered drainage system under the beach, or what?

It was hard to go home. Mom and Dad said we'd be back soon.

--Maddie

The scoop from SoCal

2008-09-13T16:44:00.008-05:00

Well, it's been another very full week around here. Dad is all geeked out about some piece of paper he got in the mail, and it's not even his new CA driver's license:

If his head looks a little larger than normal in that photo, it's not a trick of the lens...

...so I am doing what I can to keep him in his place:

We don't spend all our time lounging around in the sun, though. Why, just yesterday we woke up to 60-degree temperatures and a strange gray substance blocking the sun. I had to consult a reference book to remind myself that they were called "clouds." It was awful -- they didn't burn off until almost noon!

We've been spending a lot of time trying to get our bearings in this brave new world, so I've been reading up on the area, perusing the L.A. Times over breakfast...

...and Los Angeles Magazine's listing of the top high schools in the region:

I figure I might as well make some use of my time on the potty, since I don't know what else to do with it yet. (Is that TMI? Sorry.) Anyhow, two of the top 12 public high schools are walkable from our house. So if I can make it to high school, I should be all set. But I like painting so much that I could end up at a conservatory or something:

Normally I talk a lot more than this -- and without any prompting -- but Dad was interrupting a contemplative moment as I was trying to figure out how to get as much paint on the furniture as possible.

I hope you had a fun week, too, dear reader. Remember -- for better or worse, the Madster is watching you:

--Maddie

Learning to be Chinese

2008-08-29T01:37:00.012-05:00

Dear Friends,

I have not been ignoring you! You've been in my thoughts, but I've been trying to relax in my new fabulous home and recover from the exhaustion of moving -- taking in the mountain air and views in the lounge chair.

However, Grandma and my great aunt Helen would have none of it:

They taught me what Chinese discipline and hard work are all about:

When I was not sweeping the patio, I was training to be the next Michael Phelps. I understand the Chinese treat their victorious Olympians very well. (Maybe they're even allowed to have a second child?) Although I may not have Chinese citizenship, I feel sure China will grant it so they can dream of medaling in swimming in 2012. I look fabulous in red.

Yes, if you do the math, I won't be old enough to compete -- but as you know, that doesn't stop the Chinese.

--Maddie

July and August at a Glance

2008-08-18T19:26:00.004-05:00

What can I possibly do to catch up after so long away from the keyboard, and so many miles and so much water under the bridge?

I am overwhelmed.

I remain full of surprises:

(Farewell, 1162 Russell! Farewell, Georgia!)

And the world, blessedly, continues to surprise me:

(Hello, Descanso Gardens! Hello, California!)

I remain cool:

(I have no idea what this picture is. In fact, I assert that it was Photoshopped.)

I am still a party animal, as I demonstrated again at Uncle Jerry and Aunt Olivia's wedding:

Perhaps most importantly, I am still fabulous... and California has only augmented my fabulosity:

(Thanks for my Paris Hilton shades, Abbey! The future is so bright that I will need them.)

--Maddie

I am still alive

2008-08-18T02:56:00.002-05:00

I got this message today from Gandalf:

Dear Maddie,

It has been a month since you last posted anything on your blog. Were you so swept away by your first kiss that you have lost interest in communicating with the grown-up world? I would have expected that in 10 or 12 years time, but are you extraordinarily precocious in this respect, too?

I know that you have made a big move to a new home. Those of us who are far away would love to have some photos and hear your perspective on your new digs.

Eagerly awaiting some further postings.

Love,

Gandalf

Therefore I will soon tear myself away from the Summer Olympics (and from performing balance-beam routines on our rolled-up carpet) and return to blogging.

--Maddie

My first kiss

2008-07-18T17:56:00.004-05:00

Today, when Mama and I were saying goodbye to my friend Charlie at Chick-fil-A, he kissed me!

This came as a shock to Daddy, who thought he had about ten more years before he had to worry about this sort of thing... and who was dead sure that I was at least going to be toilet trained.

After giving it some thought, Daddy had a conversation with me at the dinner table:

Daddy: Maddie, if a boy ever tries to kiss you again, you bop him in the nose, OK?

(Pause.)

Me: (Smiling impishly) Is that funny?

Well, Mommy and Daddy thought it was pretty funny that I knew it was funny.

One last photo

2008-07-17T10:04:00.001-05:00

I realized that we had not yet had a photo of the beautiful bride...

Sarah's wedding, Take 3

2008-07-13T08:27:00.004-05:00

Sarah's wedding photog has now posted some photos from the wedding. Here are ones that are relevant to Maddie enthusiasts:

I also want to officially welcome Uncle Ken to the family:

Caption contest!

2008-07-06T15:00:00.002-05:00

Boy, it's been a long time since we've had a caption contest here -- possibly because the first few were unmitigated flops. But we are not so easily deterred. Therefore, I present to you another photo from Sarah and Ken's reception, courtesy of Uncle Tim:

And finally, uncle Jerry sent in this photo, which portrays me at about 10:30 p.m. central time, i.e. approximately three hours past my bedtime:

After this picture was taken, however, I rallied, of course!

--Maddie

My Wedding, During Which Aunt Sarah and Uncle Ken Got Married

2008-07-01T11:10:00.006-05:00

Congratulations to Aunt Sarah and Uncle Ken! I understand that sometime after I walked down the aisle tossing flower petals, made too much noise, and was escorted out by mom, you two tied the knot! Good on you! Two fine people in love -- what could be better?

There's so much to report. First, for my faithful fans, a reprise of one of last year's greatest hits, the getting-pretty-for-the-wedding photo:

I've come a long way, baby.

I practiced really hard to be a flower girl, along with Annalise and the other Madeleine who was also born on March 7, 2006 (spooky). This entailed a lot of physical conditioning:

We also played a rousing round of "London Bridge is falling down" with Mama:

It was an awesome reception with a great band. Daddy and I danced the night away:

So much fun! I wanted to be sure that Aunt Kate really savored the whole experience:

In sum, I hope to have many more weddings before I get married.

--Maddie

Summertime, summertime, sum sum summertime

2008-06-22T15:00:00.003-05:00

Good times at the Decatur Beach Party...

Into Every Life, a Big Limb Must Fall

2008-06-11T18:51:00.004-05:00

This happened on Sunday afternoon:

(This may be one where you need to click on the photo to see the large version.)

Could have been worse... ten minutes before that 40-foot secondary trunk from our neighbor's rotten old cherry tree crushed our fence and swing, Mom and I were sitting in the swing...

Snippet of conversation from the drive to school

2008-06-10T18:55:00.002-05:00

Maddie [in carseat:] Whine!

Daddy: Maddie, what happened? Did you bite your tongue?

M: Yeah. I bite my tongue.

D: You bit your tongue. "Bit" is the past tense of "bite." [Pause] The past tense is for things that happened earlier ... before now.

[Pause]

M: I bit my tongue in past tense!

2008-05-29T20:51:00.005-05:00

(Dad is taking over the blog today...)

This week at the park, Maddie found a lens that had broken off a rear bicycle light. It was orange and faceted, and sparkly.

"Maddie!" I said, "How pretty -- you found a gem! It's like a diamond or a ruby!"

There was a brief pause. She replied: "It's like an octagon!"

You might think I was impressed by this early display of vocabulary, but instead I was disappointed. You see, it was actually a hexagon.

Then I thought about it some more, and decided that actually she was technically correct -- a hexagon is like an octagon, relatively speaking.

Anyway, for those of you who just read this blog for the pictures, here are a couple from the grandparents' visit last weekend while we tried to find a house in California...

The horror! The horror!

2008-05-07T14:19:00.002-05:00

A picture is worth a thousand terrifying words:

Cute James' First Birthday

2008-04-26T19:12:00.004-05:00

Today I got all pretty...

...and went to my friend James' birthday party:

You can see that I was so beautiful that he couldn't even focus on his candles and cupcake.

Well, OK, for a brief while, anyway... then the familiar carnage ensued.

Happy first birthday, James!

--Maddie

Springtime!

2008-04-21T18:00:00.003-05:00

In springtime, a young family's thoughts turn to thoughts of real estate. We're pimping the house to sell, so naturally mom and dad have put me to work landscaping...

Inside, I'm also doing my best to help, including unleashing a baby-powder cloud that I thought would give the nursery the perfect smell that would make buyers swoon.

No, that's not smudges on the lens. That's the flash reflecting off the powder in the air.

Meanwhile, dad got a new outfit. Mom says it makes him look like big, blue marshmallow:

Bucking the trend

2008-04-19T08:24:00.002-05:00

I exist. Take that, statistics.

Seriously, though, this might explain why Barritt's dad left grad school for law school.

A force of nature

2008-04-14T19:46:00.002-05:00

Apparently, word is out that I'm moving to California.

Baa-aa-aa

2008-04-05T23:10:00.004-05:00

For some reason, this picture from the NY Times reminds me eeriliy of Dad's and my morning hair-brushing and clothing routine:

Except Dad doesn't have one of those fantastic hats.

Here's the real story. It's a good thing Dad didn't see that story before he got a job... $80 an hour to shear sheep might have sounded pretty good.

Oh, right, almost forgot to mention... Dad got a job. At Fuller Seminary. To me, this means moving near Hollywood, which will make it so much more convenient for me to become a star!

What doesn't kill you...

2008-04-03T13:26:00.004-05:00

Yes, this blog still exists.

We are only just emerging from the rigors of dad's job search, and our dark den of late-winter sickness. I just got over pneumonia -- fun, like swimming in a lake of phlegm.

Dad, who had been eerily healthy as Mom and I were battling wave after wave of germs, returned from his final job interview and promptly became deathly ill as well. You can call that mind over body, or the grace of God -- as you wish.

Anyway, let's see, what have I missed? Dad, Nana, and I all shared a birthday party in Durham:

I have also gotten really into gymnastics, although since I'm going to be six feet tall, it may not be my true calling as an athlete. This is me on the trampoline:

But, in truth, this is a better representation of the past few weeks:

Just Average

2008-03-14T15:50:00.003-05:00

Dear Readers,

This week I have had my two-year-old doctor checkup, and a parent-teacher conference at school. The report from both is just as dad expected: In size and capabilities, I am normal, healthy, average, and unexceptional.

For a three-year-old.

Nope, not kidding.

Unfortunately, my teacher also informed my parents that I have become a junior gang leader in preschool. Thought I was going to be able to fly under the radar on that one.

--Maddie

Grandma visits

2008-02-27T11:30:00.006-05:00

Dear Readers,

It is always an occasion when Grandma Chiu visits. We never eat better. Of course, I tend to trust new food coming from anyone (except my parents), but this really was special. She made us noodles, fried rice, sauteed spinach, and lots of other good things. And we went up to Buford Highway for dim sum and Chinese bao (sweet buns). I had fallen to about 50th percentile in weight (being sick nonstop will do that to you ... thanks daycare!), but I think I'm back on track now.

I have decided that I like sauce. All kinds of sauce. Anything liquid that one pours on food. Salad dressing, soy sauce, honey, marinara, cheese sauce, whatever. Pour it on. Food to pour it on is optional. I was very upset the other day when I was denied mom's sriracha.

Anyway, Grandma didn't want to miss a chance to celebrate my birthday, so we had a birthday warmup, complete with cake:

I was quite happy until they told me I had to share it.

Let me alleviate your concerns by explaining that that bug is not attacking Grandma. It was one of her birthday presents to me. The man at the store called in a butterfly, although dad insists it is a dragonfly. In any case, I enjoy running around our house with it, knocking things off shelves.

In other news, I am becoming a bit of a photographer, as I may have mentioned in a previous post. Here are a few images from my new exhibit, "Ready for My Closeup: The Human Face in Excruciating Detail":

Happy (late) Valentine's Day

2008-02-16T16:52:00.003-05:00

Daddy gave me a rose for Valentine's Day. He said that one day, lots of boys would probably want to give me flowers... but that they would have to get past him. Then he said something about buying a "shotgun," which is a word that's not in any of my books or on any of the TV channels that I watch, so I don't know what that means.

Anyway, happy Valentine's.

--Maddie

Heartwarming moment: My first insult

2008-02-09T15:27:00.001-05:00

They don't have an entry for "my first insult" in the baby books that I've seen, so it's a good thing I have a blog instead...

Today when I got up from my nap and was grumpily waiting for my afternoon Goldfish snack, Daddy walked into the kitchen and said, "Hi, Funny Socks!"

What a comic genius he is -- I have socks that make it look like I'm wearing shoes -- and you know, I just wasn't in the mood... the blood sugar was a little low, whatever. So I told him, "Daddy has funny shoes." And then I walked around him in circles a few times to make him think I was hexing him or something.

Don't mess with the Madster.

Who you calling a Neanderthal?

2008-02-07T19:55:00.000-05:00

Oh, you are so in for it, Harvey Karp. First you told my parents to tie me up, and now this.

I know where you work, so look out -- I might move there soon...

Winter wonderland

2008-02-02T12:12:00.000-05:00

Back to your regularly scheduled me...

My blog may make it appear that all I do is have fun, but in fact I am very hard-working. I have chores now.

But, OK, I do have a lot of fun...

...and I am very hard to catch.

Miller B. Hays, R.I.P.

2008-01-21T22:40:00.001-05:00

Where were you rushing off to, great-grandad? I just got here.

Heat at last! Thank God Almighty, there's heat at last!

2008-01-17T15:40:00.000-05:00

Six days and one blizzard later, our furnace is fixed and we can once again use the whole house, not just whatever two rooms had the space heaters in them. If you are buying a furnace any time soon, you may want to be aware that Amana does not keep its parts in stock, nor does it ship overnight from its factory, so you are up poop creek without a paddle if it ever breaks during the winter... which is the only time you would know that it was broken, anyway.

Here's some footage of the blizzard. Don't let your eyes fool you -- it was a blizzard. You know what they say: the camera subtracts ten inches of snow:

And yes, I do know what color snow is. I had just said it before the camera started rolling, and I am not a trained seal to perform on cue.

In general there has been much hilarity around here as winter slowly makes us all stir crazy.

Christmas con Brio

2008-01-09T17:15:00.001-05:00

A little perspective

2007-12-31T10:37:00.000-05:00

Although I missed that trip to Hawaii, I guess things could be worse.

I have made it clear to mom that she needs to be careful not to get busted.